After the concern of anovulation was raised, I came away feeling as if the doctor had told me I would never be able to have a child. It’s interesting how your brain can latch on to a thought and how that one thought can take you far away from reality.
In that moment I had no knowledge of anovulation potentially being treatable. In fact, I had no knowledge of anything. I was left feeling completely broken and confused. DEVASTATED was an understatement. There’s some capital letters for ya.
My brain took me down a staircase to a dungeon filled with questions:
“If I cannot become a mother, what is my purpose in life?”
“How is it that Matthew gets to have his dream of being a doctor and I can’t have mine of becoming a mother?”
“I can’t do the type of nursing I am doing forever, so what am I supposed to do with my life?”
“All I ever wanted was to be a mother, why isn’t God allowing this?”
Question after question surfaced in my mind as I sat on the couch at home sobbing till I had no more tears, energy, or questions left.
Thankfully, my levelheaded husband came home just in time to hold my weary soul.
He slowly explained everything to me and pulled me out of the dark dungeon, offering a ray of hope and possibility. We decided to take the doctors advice and give Clomid (basically makes you ovulate) a try. According to Google this drug seemed to be the baby candy that I needed.
Through many tears and a whole lot of prayers, things were going to be okay. I had a solution to my problem. Maybe this would be an easy fix after all.
